Reflections

We don't talk about our own spirituality much. Let me clarify that … we talk about it with our children and between ourselves but for the most part avoid the subject altogether when talking with friends and extended family. I suppose there are several reasons for this. First, for us, religion/spirituality is a private matter. We have never felt the need to convert other people to our belief system. Also, most (if not all) of our friends and most definitely all of our extended family are much more socially/politically conservative than us. Joe and I are VERY liberal. Add to that the fact that we are both atheists it is just easier at times not to talk about any of it. Because of all of these reasons finding a spiritual path to follow has been difficult.

Joe and I were both raised in Christianity. I was raised as a Southern Baptist (although we only went to church a handful of times during my entire childhood). I would say it was more fear-based than anything … fear of going to hell, fear of not getting what I wanted because I was a sinner, etc. Very early on I realized I was not a believer and was not like everyone else around me. Joe was raised in a pretty vanilla non-denominational church. It wasn’t until after we had the kids that we talked about how we would raise them. Joe took a pretty anti-organized-religion stance while for me it was more important that our kids not be baptized into any one belief system. I wanted to give them all the knowledge and tools early on to allow them to choose their own faith when they got older. Or not. At first I thought it would be good enough to raise good, upstanding people. To teach them how to be helpful, empathetic, caring and to treat others as they would hope to be treated. Then I realized that I was searching for something more ... something was missing. We were missing that sense of community. We wanted to find a group of people that were like-minded. I wanted for my kids to never feel like outcasts due to what they believed. I never thought I would find that in any sort of organized religion. I use the word religion very lightly here.

After speaking to a couple of friends and doing some internet searches I discovered Unitarian Universalism.

It is not my desire to try and convert anyone. I just feel a need to talk about this and since it is my blog I guess I am entitled. After much reading about the UU faith, searches to find a local fellowship and attempts at convincing Joe to come with me just one time to try it out we have found our spiritual home. We feel so at home and quite honestly for the first time feel like we have surrounded ourselves with like-minded people rather than always feeling like the odd-duck or outsider because of our beliefs. We fondly refer to our church as the "hippie church". Although Joe has *issues* with the word "church" because it has such a loaded connotation, so we call it a fellowship. Either way it is a beautiful old building nestled in a thick grove of trees just outside of Washington DC. The building blends in with surrounding environment rather than standing out as something different from it. During the winter we are greeted by a roaring fire in the fireplace. During the spring and summer the light filters through the forest canopy and through the domed sky lights in the sanctuary in the most beautiful of ways. In the fall we have a gorgeous view out the sanctuary windows of the turning foliage. The building is spare, with a lovely sanctuary which contains absolutely no religious iconography. The decorations are minimal and usually consist of paintings by local artists and a beautiful hand painted tree of life which hangs on the back wall. Thanks to one lady there is always a lovely arrangement of items brought in from nature … anything from a vase of twigs artfully arranged to beautiful flower arrangements using flowers grown on the property or along the roadside sitting next to the alter. It always brightens my day.

We became members in 2006, slightly before Jax was born, after attending for nearly a year. Both of our kids had their dedication ceremony last year. The dedication had less to do with bringing the kids into the religion and more to do with the people of the congregation agreeing to watch over and guide the children on their path of learning to the best of their abilities. I've become involved in teaching the religious education classes (exploring all religions and beliefs of the world) for Jaida’s age group. We are part of a larger spiritual community now, but our children will be encouraged to work out their own belief system (believing in god or not) in a supportive, welcoming environment.

It was with great sadness and horror that I read about the shooting in at the Tennessee Valley Unitarian Church in Knoxville, TN. A gunman entered the crowded sanctuary and killed two people, injuring more, while children were performing "Annie." He was eventually subdued as he stopped to reload his 12-gauge shot gun. It appears that his reasons for killing were that he was upset at not being able to find a job and he hated the liberal movement. As someone on the internet pointed out, "...if you have people like, say, Malkin and Coulter out there spreading the idea that liberals should be shot, it kind of follows that someone's going to be crazy enough to take that seriously." Is it their fault? No. Did it happen that way? We don't know. But it does make me wonder.

Shot? For being liberal?

I think many UU’s are feeling a bit rattled. Our church just recently became an official Welcoming Congregation and proudly sports a sign declaring this on the front door. We also have signs out by the road which state that we are a free-thinking, tolerant, empathetic group of people and that all are welcome. Our church supports many liberal causes and there is no doubt about what the people who enter our church believe. It is a bit worrisome though seeing as we are not located in the most liberally progressive area.

The fact that the shooter chose a community of peace-loving, open-minded and loving-hearted people to "touch" with his evil act (a word the Reverend of the church used to describe the situation), is ironic in the saddest sense of the word. One quote (from the Reverend of the UU congregation in Woodstock, TN) that caught my eye yesterday is “We don’t want to leap to conclusions and need to wait for the investigation to unfold,” Larsen said. “But if this is another example of the fruit of bigotry, it will only encourage us to pursue more vigorously our Unitarian Universalist belief in ‘the inherit worth and dignity of every person’ and to pursue ‘justice, equity and compassion in human relations.’”

All innocent victims of senseless violence have a right to be acknowledged, but my heart is with that community today. My thoughts are with all those affected. I wish you peace.

Summer Fun

We find ourselves in the middle of summer. We have been spending lots of time at the pool. Jaida is now officially a swimmer! She can dog-paddle and tread-water efficiently at this point and is now learning to swim under water with her little goggles on. She leaps (flying-squirrel style) off the side of the pool in the deep end and then swims to either Joe or myself.

Jaida is also really enjoying being able to read and spends lots of time trying to figure/sound out words on her own. The Scholastic BOB books have been a great learning tool. She is now moving onto Dick and Jane stories and some Dr Seuss books.

Jaida is also really flourishing in her piano lessons and is now playing with both hands and reading music. She really has a good ear and recognizes when she has done well with something she is playing. The curriculum her music teacher is using is Music for Little Mozarts. It is really well written and progresses at a good pace. Most of all it is interesting and fun for Jaida. She loves the workbook that comes with the music lesson book. She also loves the little animal companions that come with the music lesson book. It really makes learning fun and seem less like learning which is great. Jaida loves her Mozart Mouse, Beethoven Bear and Clara Schuman Cat.

This is the summer where we are really seeing Jaida come into her own. So far this has been a great summer with Jaida. She is so easy and we have tons of fun as a family.